This season may be over, but we’re not done ugly crying yet. #winterishereyall It’s been just a few days since this season of GOT’s finale, full of shockingly big moments, some of which have been anticipated since episode one. Season 7 was one wild ride, filled with puzzling details like ravens crossing continents in a day, and wondering just where exactly the white walkers got those insanely huge chains unless there happen to be conveniently located hidden home depots beyond the Wall.
But all of these little questions ceased to matter this past Sunday when ish got real.
We saw Littlefinger finaaaallly get beaten at his own game when his ‘chaos ladder’ came crashing down at the hands of the Stark girls. We saw mortal enemies in the same place at the same time, all walking away unscathed but double crossed nonetheless. It was at long last confirmed that Jon isn’t a Snow, he isn’t even a Jon. Heir to the Iron Throne, but he’ll always be Jon to us, sniff. We learned how OK, elated even, we could be for an aunt/nephew love tumble. And in the final moments The Wall, this mystical barrier impenetrable for thousands of years, was breached in a matter of minutes.
Raising the question: how are any of us expected to normally go about our days from now ’til 2019 without at least hourly thinking to ourselves ‘ICE DRAGON’?!
But since we have a cruelly long time to wait and think on the fate of Westeros, drop what you’re doing and take a moment to consider the pressing question that needs your attention:
Which GOT Mom are You?
Preferring humid summer nights and silky fabrics, you know the perfect accessory to everything you wear is a healthy pour of a smooth red. You like things done your way, and can hold a grudge like it’s your job. There is a small part of you that would LOVE being shadowed by a 9ft. zombie knight ready to do your bidding. You are known for the occasional unnerving verbal takedown when necessary and have an eye roll for days. You would fiercely defend your children and family by any. means. necessary. You tend to overlook your children’s shortcomings because you know they’re headed for great things. If heaven and earth were to burn to the ground, you’ve no doubt that you and yours would be the last ones standing. You smoothly employ constructive manipulation to bring your children in line and on board with your view of the world. After all, no one knows what’s best for them better than you.
Side note: You are a Lion by default if you and your spouse have ever been mistaken for siblings (this girl-all the time).
You long for colder months, feeling your best in warm velvety layers with a cup of something steamy in your hands. Throughout your life, you’ve often been perceived as cold and aloof. But the people who know you best know the glowing warmth inside. You can be eerily quiet, and are always thinking ahead. Family comes before anything else in your world. You stress goodness and duty in your children, trusting their innate moral compass to make the right choices. Your strength is in knowing you can weather any hardship life throws at your family because you stick together. It’s only natural that you would seek massively large canines and other strong women to promise to protect and defend your children in the event of your untimely demise. Resting assured that wherever life takes them, your children will eventually make their way back to the warmth of home.
Side note: Attend weddings with caution and consider bringing a weapon.
You didn’t become the dragon overnight. The timid naivety of your youth was burned in the flames of a turbulent and stormy past. You triumphantly walked out of those embers stronger, smarter, and ready to take on the world. You aren’t afraid to ask for advice from people you trust, but you have no trouble not following it either. You sometimes struggle between deciding what is right and what is smart. The children you mother are willful and have a wildness you can’t and don’t want to contain. You love them fiercely, but will step in with a stern hand if things get out of control. They mustn’t forget who holds the upper hand.
Side note: If one of your children is unexpectedly turned into an undead ice breathing force of destruction, set the other two on it and let them work it out.
There’s nothing under the sun that you haven’t seen or that could surprise you. You are careful and patient, but swift to action when the moment is right. You have always been prepared for anything and expecting everything. You easily make friends with just about anyone, but you can sort the good ones. Your delicate grace and charm are matched only by your razor sharp wit, which you bestow upon the most deserving. You understand and accept your children for exactly who they are, teaching them to utilize their unique gifts to the utmost advantage. Why fight their nature when you can teach them to wield it?
Side note: Saving an explosive secret for your dying words will ensure your place as the forever reigning ‘Queen of Shade.’
Life is much too short to worry about following anyone else’s rules. You reeeallly know how to have a good time — enjoying every good moment to the fullest and always feeling that it might be your last. You are bored by conformity and have little use for societal norms. Your family is tightly interlaced, leaving limited trust for anyone else. Understanding that life is one battle after the next, you’ve made it this far because you are a fighter. And you know that if your children are going to get ahead in this world, they had best be fighters too. You don’t shield them from the realities of life and prioritize teaching them the skills to navigate it. Why protect them when they should learn to protect themselves?
Side note: Be warned that the methods you devise to right your wrongs may come back to visit you.
What attributes do you think were missed? Where do you fall? And who do you think will be the last mom standing?
Oh and just for the record…