I Was Tricked into Getting Pregnant

It was early 2016. My sweet baby girl had just turned one. She was perfect in every way. She loved giving hugs and kisses. She slept well, ate well, and rarely got sick. She loved playing by herself and listening to music while I made dinner or got some work done around the house. Random people would stop me on the street and tell me she was the most beautiful child they had ever seen. She had always been an easy baby and I loved being her mom.

Life was grand.

I admit it. I was smug as h*ll. “This parenting thing is easy,” I thought. “Why did so many people tell me it would be hard? I guess I am just super awesome at momming. That’s probably it.”

So we decided to have more kids. One kid is great, so two kids will be twice the bliss! It’s simple math.

It turns out my daughter was playing the long con in order to ensure she had a sibling. The moment she sensed my womb was no longer vacant, she started morphing into this thing called a “toddler.” I had heard tales of these strange creatures; horror stories from moms who were in the midst of battle with one in their home. Accounts of temper tantrums told by women staring off into the distance while clutching a glass of wine. Suddenly, I was five months pregnant and had one in my home: a toddler with strong opinions about the color of her sippy cup and the ability to throw a bowl of oatmeal halfway across the room onto a dog’s head. (Seriously, toddlers are crazy strong…unless they don’t want to leave the playground. Then they suddenly do not have the strength to support their own body weight and must lay down on a pile of mulch.)

The icing on the cake is that once her little brother was born, she HATED him.

She came into the hospital room after he was born, looked at him for a while, and burst into tears. She wouldn’t sit near him, touch him, or look at him for the first month. She would try to push him out of the arms of whomever was holding him. It was rough for a bit. Please reference our family’s Christmas photo:

But guess what? Things are getting better!

I now have a two year old and an almost four month old, and they actually tolerate each other. My daughter gives her brother kisses and hugs all day long now. She is getting better at communicating, which means she is getting much less frustrated. We still have temper tantrums, but I am no longer totally thrown for a loop when they happen. We are finding our groove as a family and starting to function. I work as a Realtor, so having some time to myself to work outside the home has been wonderful for my sanity, while still allowing me the flexibility to be with my kids most of the time.

Things aren’t easy, but my kids are wonderful. I love them so much, and I couldn’t imagine it any other way.

Improvement!

So what did this parenting roller coaster teach me? Here are a few takeaways for you:

1. When things are easy, don’t be a smug butthole. Just enjoy your life as it currently is because, inevitably, a new phase of life will come and knock you off your high horse.
2. Just as all great phases don’t last forever, neither do low points. When things are crazy and you want to pull out all your hair or run away to the Bahamas, remind yourself that this is a phase. It will pass. Things will get better.
3. Toddlers are amazing, fun, adorable, entertaining, darling, sweet, extraordinary emotional terrorists. We love them, but we don’t always like them. It is ok. Give them lots of hugs, and give yourself lots of grace. You’ve got this.

Have you had a similar experience with your toddler? Share with us by leaving a comment!

, , , ,

3 Responses to I Was Tricked into Getting Pregnant

  1. Susan February 13, 2017 at 10:40 am #

    Love this Jessi! You have a gift!

  2. Julia Belsante February 13, 2017 at 11:41 am #

    This is my life!!!!! Currently reading this in a parking lot while Teddy sits in his car seat in timeout. He just entered the toddler phase and– holy cow– I forgot how hard it is!! Thanks for the pep talk!

  3. diane February 17, 2017 at 12:08 am #

    omgsh this is exactly my life right now! thanks for writing this…seriously.